Wake Up With Marci

How did you start to reidentify who you were at first? It really did feel like, “Oh my gosh, what do I do now? This is what I’ve wanted to do since I was 12 years old.” If you’re doing what you love and what you’re passionate about, I promise you, the money part will fall into place. This is Aaron Ali. For 30 years, she was a radio DJ 24 of those in Boston, sharing feel-good stories and helping people start their day with a smile. Then corporate cuts ended the career she’d dreamed of since she was 12. At 52, she was starting over, and for the first time, she had zero desire to go back. So, she taught herself how to create a podcast, watching a zillion YouTube videos, and turned her passion for positivity into feelgood frequency. As a breast cancer survivor, mom to a severely special needs kiddo, and wife of a 26-year Navy veteran, she’s learned that even when life hits hard, this is where she celebrates it. One story, one moment, one good vibe at a time. You also are a breast cancer survivor. I hit something and I was like, “What is that?” And I hit a tumor. What’s going to happen after here? Being preventative gives you a fighting chance. If I don’t start, I’m never going to start because it’s never going to be perfect. Aaron, thank you so much for being on Wake Up with Marcy. Thank you, Marcy. I am honored to be here. I got to tell you, you are a remarkable woman. I’ve been following your story a bit and and you and I have had a conversation and I’m really super excited to have you on the show to help us because you’ve gone through it. You’ve gone through multiple hardships, obstacles, and you have transformed and you are doing amazing work today. So, thank you for sharing so openly today on wake up to help others. A thank you. That’s so kind.

Yeah. So, let’s talk about your career first. I mean, you were you spent 30 years in radio. You had your own show. Yeah. And then because of what happens so often, right, they have these massive let goes and they’re they’re reducing the amount of employees they have the companies because they’ve got to, you know, let some people go because things are changing with the corporation. And because of that, you were let go. Yes. So, and that’s so hard because a lot of people are being let go and and we’re at an older age, you know, and you’ve been in that career for 30 years like I had said. And so, when that happened for you, what did that feel like? I mean, that was your a big huge part of your identity. Yeah, I was actually going to say it kind of felt like I lost my identity because and I know they always say your job is not who you are and you are not your job and and I agree with that in most circumstances but being on the radio I was never I’m not a fake person. I don’t know how to be fake. So, I shared so much of my life on the air and I was very transparent and went through some things and and told listeners about it and and tried to help them with experiences that I had. And it was just such a a huge part of who I am, what I did on the radio. And so, at first it really did feel like, oh my gosh, what do I do now? This is what I’ve wanted to do since I was 12 years old. And what what’s going to happen after here? Right.

So share with us how did you start to reidentify who you were and find your self-worth and that next chapter for you? How did you find the confidence to start over? I have a terrific husband who is a big cheerleader of mine and kept saying, you know, this just means that there’s something bigger that you’re supposed to be doing. And he had said that for years, especially toward the end of my being in radio, he said, you know, what are you going to do next? And I kept saying, what are you talking about? I don’t want to do anything next. And and then when it finally happened, you know, he was reminding me, there’s there’s a reason for this. There’s going to be something on the other side for you, and I will cheer you on and support you with whatever you decide. And I kept thinking, gosh, I miss telling feel-good stories because that was one of the big things that I did every day was I found a story that, you know, usually when you watch the news or anything like that, they’ll have maybe a human interest story at the end for 37 seconds that’s going to make up for all the bad you just heard about. But I would pull those stories because I I thought, you know, wow, what a happier place it would be if we started with those stories. If we we talked more about those stories instead of all the negative. I I mean, not to live completely naive. I know we have to know about certain things, but just the happy what would life be like if the first page of any newspaper was good news, something wonderful that happened instead of all of the bad. So, every day I would tell these stories and I do a couple a day and I missed them and I had listeners that had emailed me after I got let go like, “Oh my gosh, your stories would uplift my day.” And so I was, “Okay, how can I still do something like that?” And then I thought about podcasting. I had never been on a podcast. I had never done a podcast, but I YouTubed the death out of it. And I went from one video to the next to the next for about three and a half weeks. And then I said, “You know what? I’m never going to feel ready, so I’m just going to do it.” And and that was I just jumped in cuz I thought I I already have the experience behind me of being able to talk. I think that’s a huge obviously part of podcasting. If you’re nervous in front of a camera or in front of a microphone, it’s going to take you a while to get used to it. But I thought, you know what? I’ I’ve been doing this. This is just I’m going to have a camera because I never had a camera before. So I was like, I’ll do video and audio. And you know, if I mess up, I’ll just laugh about it and it’ll be fun to grow it. And people that that find it like, “Hey, look at episode one versus episode 25 or and just to see how different it is.” And and I have had the best time and I’m finding people to talk with that make the world a better place. And so I am so re-energized and so excited and it is a blast to and I’m doing everything myself. I don’t have a producer, an editor, not it’s me. But that also makes it fun because I’m like I I’m doing it out of my house so I can do an interview that’s, you know, England is a totally different time zone. I I’m I’m right here. Whatever time you want to wake up, I’ll be here. And so I’m just it’s so fun to be able to bring people to a podcast that are truly finding ways to make the world a better place. And a lot of the stories, they started off really tragically. Something bad happened and that was what was the catalyst for this person starting a nonprofit or wanting to help others. And it’s just such a great reminder of how many wonderful people are out there. And so I’m I am in the best part of my life if you can believe that. It’s true. I’m having so much fun. No, listen, I believe it. I I’m so aligned with so many of the things that you said. So, when I started, well, I had a TV show and then I I moved to podcasting, but prior to that, how I started was on a Facebook live show called Coffee with Marcy. And I basically harnessed everything from my career because I’d always worked in television and then in my 40s I got in front of the TV and in front of the camera and I learned so much about uh being in front of the camera and the production and and that side of things. And so when I started the show it was it was just like you said. It was like, “Okay, I’m figuring this out as I go, but if I don’t start, I’m never going to start because it’s never going to be perfect. I’m never going to feel fully ready.” And one of the things that you said, and this is what I did, because a lot of people would ask me like, “How do you do that?” Right? But I instead of trying to be perfect and and feeling so bad about myself if it wasn’t perfect, I would laugh at myself, right? And we’re all human. We all make mistakes, right? And just from there, it continued to grow and grow and evolve and and now it it’s almost like, well, you’re doing what you’re supposed to do now in this chapter.

So for someone out there like if downsizing has happened and they are having to try to figure out what is next, what would you say to them? I would say first of all keep the faith in yourself and your abilities because your next step might not look exactly like what you were doing but what you have isn’t starting from zero. You have experience and you have something to bring to the table. It doesn’t matter how old you are, you have something to bring to the table. I feel like at a certain point people are like, uh, well, they’re not going to hire me because I’m this age or they’re not going to hire me because I’m might be too expensive for that company. Okay, well maybe for that company you are, but that doesn’t mean you’re going to be for another one. Also, if you maybe you were let go for a reason that’s going to make your life better that I try to hold on to that thought as well. Even when cuz so many different things have happened to me in my life that I’m like, “Wow, here we go again.” But every single one has made me who I am and stronger and I just don’t want people to lose the faith. Also, I think about and this is what I did. What made me happy as a kid? What made me when we were younger, everything was it seemed fast, but it was it was slow. We took time to go play and enjoy life. And maybe the next part of your life is supposed to be more of that in a way that you can still earn a living. You know, it might look different. It might not be the same paycheck, but there are if you’re doing what you love and what you’re passionate about, I promise you the money part will fall into place. It’s 100% finding your passion. And you know, I always say that too, like how does someone reinvent themselves, right? Or you know, the kids are leaving, they’re getting to an age, maybe they’ve been a mom and at home. I always say go back. Go back. What did you love when you were younger, right? And maybe that because that’s when we didn’t have all of the weight of the world on us and we were able to dream and be creative and tap into the things that made us happy. So what is it that made you happy then? Maybe that’s what you’re supposed to be doing today. And that’s actually again what I did because imagine getting in front of the camera in your 40s, which was very hard for me to do, but that was my dream when I was young. I wanted to be a model. I wanted to be an actress. I actually wanted to be Erica Kane from All My Children, didn’t everybody? So, it was so funny. So, it was like, wow. Yeah, it was hard. and and it created a lot of change in my life. But ultimately through that process, it’s been an amazing amazing journey and I’m grateful to be where I am today because of that. So I’d say, you know, keep going and and just as you said, like dive into those passions and those things that sparked you when you were younger and uh and and when you’re doing what you love, it doesn’t feel like work, right? It doesn’t. It doesn’t. I had 30 years of no work and I got paid for it and it was lovely. Like I it’s it was just it was my childhood dream come true. And that’s the other thing and I love how you said that cuz I think it’s really really true about circling back to when you were a kid. Maybe also when you were a kid you wanted to do something and you had older people, different generations saying, “Oh, you know, a lot of people want to do that. Why don’t you do something more practical?” What was that thing? you know, can you go back and and study it and try to get into it in some way, shape, or form? Maybe it’s not going to be exactly the way you think it would be, but it’s still out there. As long as you are breathing, you are still able to chase a dream. And I just think life is too short not to. Right. Right. Live the dream. Right. Live the dream. Yeah.

So, you also are a breast cancer survivor. I am. Wow. Can you share with us that story because that’s a miracle what happened for you. It really was a miracle. So, in end of 2017, I had a 3D mammogram which was the most telling of mamograms. Totally clear. Everything was great. In May of 2018, I was in my closet trying to figure out what to wear. It was going to be a really nice day the next day. And I saw this one tank top and I was talking to myself and I said, “Oh, that would look so much cuter if these were just a little bigger.” And I I hit my right breast as I was talking to myself. Oh, if these were just a little bigger and I hit a tumor. I hit something and I was like, “What is that?” And I it was a lump. And the first thing I think probably every woman does is you go to the other side to see if there’s something that feels similar. And there wasn’t. And I was like still trying to talk myself out of it, thinking, “Wait a minute, I just had a mamogram not even six months ago.” So I ran downstairs and I said to my husband, you know, you seem to care about these more than you just normal. And he goes, “No, it actually,” and I think this was such a good explanation. It feels like a knot. Like if you were getting a massage and you can feel that the therapist hit something and you’re like, “Oo, that is a knot. I didn’t even know.” That’s exactly what it felt like. And so I went and did another 3D mammogram and all that and it was stage two breast cancer already. So did that grow that quickly from the the initial uh test? Yeah. Yes. It’s the fastest growing, fastest spreading kind of breast cancer. It’s called uh triple negative. And the average person who gets it is either a a black woman, Latino, or very young Caucasian. I was I think like 45. So I and white girl like did not fit any of that stereotype of the people that normally get it. It’s also I want to say maybe 10 to 15% of breast cancers. It’s a it’s a small percentage of the breast cancers that are out there and yeah I was already in stage two. And so my oncologist said I’m looking at your scans from not even six months ago and this was not there. So if you had waited, if you hadn’t have somehow just touched that tumor that day and found it and you waited till your next appointment, you would have been stage four. There’s there’s absolutely no doubt because it would have had another seven months to grow. God works in amazing ways. Truly truly does. And it really makes you realize how important getting our mammograms are. And even after you get them to continue to test on yourself, right? Yes. Yes. I never did self- exams ever. I mean, I probably could have counted on one hand because I had called dense breasts. And so for me, I was like, I couldn’t tell if I had a lump anyway. Yeah, you can. I definitely could tell. Yeah. when I hit it that it was not normal. And so thankfully I hit that just by accident. And now I am a big advocate of hey please check yourself that do not rely just on the mammogram. And if you are getting mammogs please try to push especially if you have dense breasts for 3D mammograms because they are yes more expensive for the insurance company but they are more telling and they can save your life. So that’s another thing that I’m always saying cuz holy cow this also through this story shows how important it is that we do get our tests because if we get the test if we’re doing the self-exams then we have a fighting chance like you and you know shame on me I’m getting one at the end of this month but I didn’t even realize like my god it’s been over two years right so it’s easy. It’s easy to put it off, but we should prioritize it, you know, just like anything else in our lives. And being preventative gives you a fighting chance.

What did this experience teach you about yourself and and the importance of self-care? I think especially through all of that, I kept hearing people say just like when you’re on an airplane and they say if the masks drop, put it on yourself before you help the person next to you. And oh man, did I always hate that cuz I’m like h I would help my kid before I help myself. And then as this and just like perfect example, as you were saying, it’s been two years. If it was your child, if it was your your husband, if it’s somebody else that we’re we’re constantly, you know, helping and and in charge of, we wouldn’t let it slide that much. But with us, we do. And if we are not at our best and taking care of ourselves, everything around us goes to the wayside. And so, I learned that it it is not selfish to put in for a massage appointment for yourself or to do things that are going to make you feel your best. and therefore be your best. And when I found out that it was stage two and it I immediately turned into warrior mode, like I’m this is messing with the wrong person. Big C is not taking me down. But I also felt like I found it for a reason. I had a platform of being on the radio and I could get on there and tell people this is what I’m going through. You need to check yourself. You need to be your own advocate. Don’t skip appointments. And I was able to do that. And it was so beautiful to have so many listeners then within those years after say I never checked myself and I did and I found something and it was cancer and I thank you for saying so it’s like wow I did find purpose in it. I also decided that I was going to dress as Wonder Woman for every single chemo appointment and I did. I I was only going to do it for the first one. I said it on the air. I’m like I don’t you know cancer’s messing with the wrong girl. I’m coming in in my Wonder Woman costume on Monday for my first chemo. And I did. But once I got there, all these other women were like, “You go, girl.” And it was so cool to see them get happy and cheer them up. That what started off as just like a joke. I was just going to do it for the first time. I literally wore the same costume every single chemo appointment. And it made everybody around me smile. And you brought you brought a little lightness, right? It was worth it. It was so it was so worth it. I’m glad I did that because I think it also helped lighten that heaviness of it for people around me as well. 100%.

So after all this and and you started your podcast feelgood frequency which I love the name because I talk about energy work and what we put out there is what we receive. And in following you and watching some of your stories and your podcasts, you always have amazing things that are happening for you. And I do too since I have changed my frequency, right? And I am putting out good gratitude, happiness. Life has changed significantly for me. So what are your thoughts like what was the purpose behind the name feel-good frequency and what are you finding in your life now that has changed since you yourself has changed your frequency? I think that for me the the whole feel-good frequency when I was on the radio, I loved telling happy stories, feel-good stories was what I always called them because when we watched the news anytime it’s all all bad, bad bad bad and then maybe 30 seconds of something uplifting at the end like woohoo, this is a great story. Thank you so much. This lemonade stand just raised $10,000 for the local shelter, whatever it and it’s adorable, but I’m like wow, that’s what I want to hear about. I mean, I know that we have to know what’s going on in the world and that kind of thing, but I loved that idea of just being able to bring the good. So, when I was reinventing what I was going to do, I kept thinking about, okay, I don’t want to call it like feel-good stories. I didn’t want it to be what I was doing on the radio because now I don’t have to play songs in between. I mean, I I love music and stuff. When I was on the radio, I’d have like a minute to tell a story or 34 seconds as the song started. And now it’s wow, I can just talk about the happy. I can tell crazy stories that have happened in my life that I learned something from or that were funny, but I can also talk to all these people all around the world that are doing things in their communities that are making a difference and they’re making the world a better place. And I thought there is nothing better that nothing would make me happier than just talking to people from all over who are finding the good even through the worst situations you know and we can right we it’s so hard living in in that place of gratitude right and and finding the lesson lesson through the difficult times and but you can it is about how you get through those obstacles in life because life is going to happen no matter what but it’s how we face them and a lot of it’s about our mindset.

So for someone out there, what’s a mindset shift that you could recommend to someone that’s going through a difficult time or rediscovering their purpose? You’re here for a reason. You have made it this far. And you know, not to be all Tom Brady on you, but you didn’t get this far to only get this far. So there’s something there for you. Sit with yourself in silence. Maybe go for a walk in, you know, the woods like we used to do when we were kids and skipping stones and stuff. Just si simplify things and just look in inside yourself and remember how strong you are. Because even when you’re feeling weak and I never did, it’s very hard for me to do the why me thing because that is such a rabbit hole that if you start doing like yeah, why is this happening to me? I’ve had enough crap happen. That is just a cesspool of nothingness that no good can come of it. It’s just going to put you to a different level that you don’t want to be at. So, I’m a big believer in just sitting with yourself, reminding yourself that you’ve made it this far, that you’ve gone through a whole lot of things maybe that nobody that you know has even been through, but you’ve gotten there. And you have more. You have all the power. You have all the power. You can do hard things. And I promise you that you put the work in, it’s going to come back. It just like you said with the energy, if you keep trying, you can’t fail. You just keep trying. Even if you fail, you’ve learned something. But then keep going as long as you keep going. You’re not failing. You’re just learning. Yeah. 100% learning and evolving.

Erin, I want to thank you so much for sharing your story and your heart with us today. You are definitely living proof that we are never too old, too broken, never too old. Never too old to begin again. Right. Right. That’s right. You can begin again. I promise. Yeah. So, just want to share with all of you out there, my listeners, if you’re someone who’s navigating the early days of sobriety, I want to personally invite you to check out my new book, Wake Up, You’re Not Broken, a companion for your first 30 days of sobriety. This book was written from my heart to yours to walk with you through the vulnerable, brave, and beautiful beginning of your healing journey. and it’s available now for pre-sale on Amazon. Aarin, I’m going to put all of your information in the show notes. I’m so excited about your podcast and all of the things you’re doing and your messaging. And I just for everyone, no matter what you’ve been through, you are not broken. You are becoming and it’s time to wake up to your worth. So Erin, thank you again and everyone listening. It’s been a great show.